Proverbs 31 Woman: Plan Ahead and Don't Be Lazy

The Proverbs 31 woman...the ultimate goal of every wife, to be the woman of noble character, the one whose husband and children rise up and call her blessed. Yes, I want to be a Proverbs 31 gal, but how? Lord, help me to be the woman you want me to be.

"She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants...She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness." (Proverbs 31:15, 27)

My husband and I share the responsibilities of cooking in our home (mainly because he is a chef and he enjoys cooking on his own time). However, I find joy in preparing delicious dishes for my husband, especially when he comes home after a long day in the kitchen cooking for his job. I don't want him to have to come home and feel like he has to cook again. But just for the record, he does cook sometimes when he gets home from work before me, because my husband knows that it means a lot to me to have a nice meal together every night. Today, as my goal is to be more of a Proverbs 31 gal, I am focusing on the cooking and food prep area of my wifely responsibilities.

Plan Ahead: If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

"She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants" (Proverbs 31:15)
The Proverbs 31 woman got up while it was still night. I bet she probably had a mental to do list running through her head and decided to get up and get started on it. She knew it was important to feed her household and knew that it required planning. I find that, for me, cooking requires thinking ahead. I do better if I spend some time meal planning, looking through recipes and coming up with some meals to make for a couple weeks. I am now working on finding recipes for meals that I can prepare ahead of time and possibly freeze, or at least prepare quickly when I get home from work. I am also striving to prepare healthier meals at the same time. Once I have a meal plan, I then make a grocery list with the items I need to buy to make those meals. I also clip coupons and pull coupons for the items that I need to buy that week. All this takes time and I've found that when I don't plan ahead, I am stressed out about what to eat and I don't cook dinner joyfully and with love. Or we end up eating out, spending money on food that isn't healthy for us. In time, I know I will get better at this and it will take me less time to plan ahead.

Don't Be Lazy: Just do it
"She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness." (Proverbs 31:27)
The Proverbs 31 woman knew the needs of her household and made sure they were met, no matter what; she did what she had to do to make sure things were done. That takes a woman who isn't lazy and idle. There are days when I don't feel like doing anything in my home: laundry, cleaning, cooking - nothing! While rest is important, I also believe that it's too easy to let laziness overtake me when my feelings don't line up with my responsibilities. I've found that since I am a morning person, it's best for me to get up early and get going on things around the house, before I head out to work at 8am. Joe works early some days, so when he gets up at 5am, so do I. After packing him a lunch and handing him a cup of coffee on his way out the door, I get started on my to do list. I'll do laundry, put away dishes, straighten up the house, and do my Bible reading with a cup of coffee. Last week, I thought ahead and was thoroughly pleased with the results. I had planned to make homemade mac & cheese for dinner that night. So that morning, after Joe left for work, I decided to make it ahead of time so that when I came home from work, it was ready to go in the oven. It was so nice to be able to come home and have a nice dinner that required little effort before it was ready to go on the table. Now, there are mornings when I would love to go back to sleep for another hour or two before getting up and ready for work. But I know that my priority is to take care of my home and leave the evening free to spend time with my husband. For me, there are no advantages to laziness, just stress and regret over wasted and misused time.

Change is Good

 

Joe and I got married on March 30, 2013. It was a beautiful day that I will never forget. We said our vows, exchanged our rings, and joined our lives as one. Looking back over the year and half of planning and preparation for this day, I am glad it's over. But my life was forever changed that day. And being on this side of my wedding day, I couldn't be happier. It's been almost a month; everyday I am thankful for my husband and I love being married to my best friend. So how has my life changed since being married? Here's just a few thoughts...  

From Momma's House to My House...uh, Our House 
Well, I moved out of my parents house and moved in with my husband into our new home. That hasn't really been difficult - the leaving my parents part - because I was ready for this. I knew it was coming and I eagerly awaited the day when I could say that I moved out for good. I feel like a real adult now. :) But, it has been a change in moving in with my husband. For one, sleeping with someone and sharing a bed is a little weird, after sleeping alone for 27 years. It's getting better, and I love the waking up and snuggling part, but the getting to sleep I'm-tired-and-you're-in-my-space part, that's still a little difficult. But that's just it. The whole you're-in-my-space part - that's been the most difficult (and fun) part of marriage so far. There's always someone in your space. And it's not all about me anymore. It's about us. Everything we had as individuals has been brought into this marriage and is now shared...our personal space, our "privacy", our attitudes, our baggage, our ideas...everything is out there in the open. Yes, it's liberating to be so open with someone and know that they love you no matter what, but sometimes, I still want my space. We're learning how to balance time together as a couple and time apart as individuals. I don't want to lose who I am in the fact that I'm a wife. My husband doesn't want that either. We need to find a good balance, and we will, in time.  

Priorities: Sleep vs. Sink Full of Dishes?
Another thing that changed for me is that in becoming a wife I've also become a homemaker. Cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, organizing, decorating, making meal plans and grocery shopping, clipping coupons, the list goes on! And it's all things that I've never really had to do before (because I lived at home and Mom did it!) But I've had an amazing example of what it looks like (Thanks, Mom!) and so I feel prepared to rise to this challenge. So far, I feel like I've done pretty well and I'm learning what works best for me and my husband. Again, it's about balance...and priorities. Sure, I'd love to sleep an extra hour in the mornings, but I know that if I do, I'll be stressed when I get home from work because I didn't think ahead about what to make for dinner, or do that load of laundry that needs to be done, or wash that sink full of dishes. And my husband (when he's off and home in the evenings) likes me to spend quality time with him. I just can't do it all! Can I? I believe I can, if I prioritize what's important and make adjustments where necessary. I show my husband that I love him by cooking him a good meal, getting the laundry done, and keeping a clean organized home. And just for the record, my husband does cook dinner 1-2 times a week and clean the house 1-2 times a week, so I do have help from him. He really is amazing! 

I love being a wife and everyday I pray that God will help me to be a good wife, to love my husband and to respect him as I should. God is still working on me, and thank God my husband understands that I'm not perfect (yet!). I'm still becoming the woman I want to be...